respite

I had some InterVarsity meetings near San Antonio last week, so of course booked my ticket to fly into Austin a little bit beforehand to see people.  It was too short and I didn’t get to see anyone for as long as I’d like, but I’m still grateful.  I’m not eloquent enough to write about how good it was to be there – but I will still try.

–  I walked into 5619 and got to hug so many different people.  I had forgotten what it felt like to be known and to know people at church. It has been too many Sundays of summoning strength and energy to walk into a church where everything is new.  It was kinda nice to have a little bit of a big deal made about me being there… to feel like I’d been missed.  I felt the same way when visiting my staff team at the office.  If I could bottle that feeling, I would – to save it up for the lonely days here.

– One morning, CG had gone out and bought my favorite Mrs. Johnson’s doughnuts – the chocolate cake kind.  It was nice to wake up to familiar donuts, but even more touching was the thought and knowledge that went behind it.  Hmm, I see a theme here.

– I knew without thinking where the grocery store was, and how to get there.  I had a lovely walk in my old neighborhood.  I was so glad to be able to navigate, to remember that I am a fairly competent person who knows where things are and maybe just maybe that will happen for me someday here.   It’s amazing how much brain overhead I didn’t realize I had been using just to exist here in California, and how exhausting it is to be lost all the time.

– And friendly people – it was nice to be around them again.  I’m sure Californians are nice enough once you get to know them, but that’s the tricky part – getting to know them – overall they’re not warm people.  It was great to be back in a place where people say hi on the street and feel like you could have a conversation if you wanted to.  Recently someone described Silicon Valley to me as more intense than New York City, but people fake that they’re laid back because it’s California and you’re supposed to be.  Great.

– Visiting with my old staff team and friends felt so normal and familiar, it was a little scary.  Partway through the sermon I had to stop and remind myself that I didn’t live in Austin anymore and to try and soak in the evening even more.  To pay attention and not just let it slip by.

– Late night chai at flightpath where JB reminded me that I had made a califorward list before I left.  Just her remembering that and telling me was encouraging.

– And, I got to have breakfast tacos.  Twice.  And there is an awesome seesaw mustache at El Chilito now.  Rock on.  (Austinites, you gotta try it).

the picture does not capture how awesome this is

I’ve been trying to be thankful this week amidst my exhaustion and being sick again.  I’m thankful for the chance to have been around my Austin family.

now playing: Patty Griffin – Burgundy Shoes

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