Earlier this week I went down the “things a year ago were easier because…” road. I came up with things like: my sister didn’t have cancer, I didn’t feel like I was drowning in my work responsibilities, close friends hadn’t moved away, there was a 2 year old and a newborn down the street from me, etc. It’s not a very good game to play, no one wins.
Of course, I thought about it more and my sister did have cancer, we just didn’t know it… my friends were thinking about moving away, I just didn’t know it… Ignorance is often bliss, for sure. That with knowledge, comes responsibility. Knowing Tiff had cancer means responding accordingly, etc etc. There’s been a lot that I’ve learned that I’m still trying to figure out how to respond.
It’s much more blissful not to know that at least 3000 people a week are dying in Darfur. 9/11 every week, and flags aren’t at half mast, no one’s talking about life post darfur, or whatever. It’s an area the size of Texas!
When I think about this stuff, sometimes I just feel exhausted (like right now). Props to phoebe for her insights. I also think I’m learning the significance of sabbath. There’s this amazing quote in the sabbath book I read recently. But it’s not here now, so I’ll have to add it later.